Special Moments Early January

These were videos made shortly after Christmas in early January.

First Christmas

This was a very special Christmas for us because it was Drea's first. Christmas of 2008 was depressing for us because we'd had a miscarriage earlier in the month, and it made it all the more special that Drea was here this year. She met many of her family members at Christmas gatherings.

On Christmas Eve we went to Westminster and spent all day with the Mabrys. The food was great, and it was wonderful to spend some time out of the house with adults. They oohed and ahhed over Drea and spent time passing her around, which was nice because it gave me a break.




My family spent the night Christmas Eve and slept on air mattresses. I stayed up until 4:30 in the morning with the baby. She was very fussy and refused to sleep. On Christmas morning my nieces and nephew opened their gifts from Santa and their parents (Santa only gets credit for one gift apparently). Then we rushed around getting ready for lunch. My dad's extended family had their big Christmas lunch at our house this year.



After everyone left we gave the kids presents from us and had supper. Brian and I took a nap when my sister in law offered to watch her so I could get some rest.




The day after Christmas my old friend Katherine and her husband Mark stopped by to see us for a couple of hours on their way home to Florida. Then we went to Clemson for lunch with the Stepps.



We enjoyed all the family meals, and to be honest we enjoyed showing off our new baby too. It was great introducing her to everyone. I was wiped out by the time it was over, but it was worth it.

First Tub Bath

First Thanksgiving

The day before Thanksgiving we got a visit from Brian's cousin and her family. They live in Germany so we don't see them very often. One of the gifts she brought us was the wrap in the first two photos here. It was hard for me to catch onto at first (I blame the pain meds), but I am really glad I decided to try baby wearing. I had a baby that didn't want to be put down at all those first two months, so being able to hold her close and still have my hands free was a life saver. She has always loved being in the wrap; nine times out of ten she goes to sleep when I wear her. It makes shopping so much simpler than trying to lug around a heavy car seat. I loved wearing her so much I spent big bucks to buy another wrap. I bought a Didymos wrap just a few weeks ago.
This Thanksgiving was more special for me than any that we'd ever had. I was grateful to have my life's biggest blessing with us, so a holiday dedicated to giving thanks during her fourth week seemed perfect.
Our very first Thanksgiving with Drea was exhausting but fun. My mom and sister in law came over and cooked dinner for the family at our house while I rested. It was also nice having other people hold her so I could sit and eat my meal in peace. They loved passing her around.
My brother brought the kids over when it was almost time to eat, and my dad drove over as well. The kids were rambunctious as usual, but they were fun and enjoyed seeing the baby again.
After the meal my mom told me to go to bed and they would all watch out for the baby. So Brian and I both napped for a few hours while my family had run of the house. That was nice. That evening we put up our Christmas tree before every body went home. It went by pretty quickly, but it was a very special Thanksgiving.

Those First Few Days...

Were wonderful and horrible at the same time. Drea wouldn't nurse; she got angry when milk didn't just come gushing out. She wouldn't sleep unless she was being held because she was hungry. So there was lots of screaming and her mommy and daddy got zero sleep that first night. I was still blissfully happy that she was here, and I enjoyed the visits from the friends and family that came to meet her.


The second day was still pretty rough. One good thing about it; I got to get up and get a shower. The pain from the C-section wasn't too terrible as long as I remembered to take the pain meds before they wore off. Brian went home for a shower and nap while my mom and sister in law stayed with us. My sister in law came back late at night to help out so I could get some sleep, but she ended up talking to Brian the whole time. I think they were unaware that they were keeping me awake. After Drea went 24 hours without really nursing (she kept pulling away and screaming or falling asleep) we started "cup feeding" her small amounts of formula to keep her from getting dehydrated, and I started pumping trying to get colostrum to mix in with the formula and attempt to build a supply.


On our last full day in the hospital a nurse suggested we send Drea to the nursery for a little while to get some sleep. They swaddled her up and took her away. It bothered me for her to be away, but we got two hours of sleep before she woke up hungry and they brought her back. The breast feeding issues continued (they never changed actually), but she was sleeping for two hours at a time without being held now that we were cup feeding her. We sent her to the nursery two more times; once we even got to sleep for four hours. I was nervous the whole time but I had to sleep. Brian went home on day two and three to feed the dog, take a shower, eat supper, and take a nap while my mom and other family members stayed with me and Drea. We got excellent care in the hospital, but by Friday we were ready to go home.

My brother Daniel met us at the house with my nieces and nephew. They hadn't been able to meet her yet due to a ban on visitors under 18 (due to the flu scare). I had worried that my youngest niece would be jealous because she is used to getting lots of attention from me, but she loved the baby and begged to hold her.
I was in a fog those first few weeks at home. We discovered that we had a fussy baby that suffered from colic and acid reflux. I had to give up the idea of exclusive breast feeding, and this meant that I was doing round the clock pumping instead. We were still having to feed her a good bit of formula in spite of all that pumping. She still wouldn't sleep more than an hour unless someone was holding her for several weeks. Between all of this and the pain meds I was on, the details are a little foggy to me now. I mainly remember being exhausted and terrified of SIDS or some other calamity. I thought for a couple of weeks there that I might end up needing medication for post partum depression, but I got better.

In spite of all of that there were moments of pure bliss. I wanted to put her down a little more often than she was willing, but there were many times I enjoyed holding and cuddling her. I loved studying her little face and hands, and I kept telling myself the bad stuff was going to get better. I would do it all over again for her, but I am glad I don't have to.

November 3rd - Birthday

Tuesday November 3 2009. 8:21am.

I was so nervous. There were so many things that could go wrong. I was particularly worried about her lungs because she was a couple of weeks early. But as soon as I heard that loud, healthy cry I knew she was OK. I had to wait just a few minutes to see her, but it seemed like forever.

I cried when they finally brought her over to me. I couldn't believe she was finally here. Just a few years ago I thought I wouldn't be able to have any kids, and then my first pregnancy ended in a miscarriage. I had been so devastated and almost gave up on children. But suddenly she was there crying her little heart out; the answer to my prayers right beside me.



I had to go back to the recovery room for over an hour until I could move my legs enough to pull my knees up to the height of the rails on my stretcher. I actually dozed off for a little while, but couldn't sleep for long; I wanted to hold my baby! Meanwhile Daddy was in the nursery watching the nurses check her out and give her a sponge bath. He finally got a chance to hold her and show her off to the family waiting outside the window.

I don't even have words to describe how happy I was the first time they put her in my arms. She was worth every minute of all those months of anxiety. I know it's a tired cliche, but my life suddenly seemed to have more of a purpose. Everyone says it, but I couldn't believe how much love I felt for this tiny little person. My heart melted on the spot.